On the House

Avoiding bartending gaucheries

Where’s my camcorder when I need it? I’ve apparently slipped through a rip in the fabric of time and space and have landed at the bar from hell. Forget asking where it is, because it could very well be in your neighborhood. Let me just say that sitting here at the bar affords me a glimpse into Dante’s Inferno. So this is what nether regions look like?

A quick look around the room tells the story. The guy in the corner booth...the one with the irritated expression...was just served a drink sloshing over the rim with little pieces of sopping paper napkin stuck to the sides. He looks a lot happier though than the two suits seated by me at the bar. They’ve been fuming for easily ten or twelve minutes with empty glasses. The impatient rapping of their glasses on the bar is an unmistakable sign that they’re about to be lost causes. Sure enough, a few short minutes later the two briskly head out the front door with the deportment of men who’ve tolerated enough bad service for one night.

The problem is the bartenders are otherwise occupied. They’re seemingly working to capacity occasionally making drinks for servers, washing a glass or two and flirting with the coeds sitting by the station. I’ll wager that it’s about all these young men can handle. It’s a shame that no one’s indoctrinated this hapless pair on the long-term benefits of rendering hospitable service.

Murphy’s Law — people get the worst service on those dog days when they can least emotionally afford it.

We all have our thresholds. Rankle our sensibilities, trod on our concepts of lounge etiquette and we’ll rebel. There are unwritten conventions governing professional bar conduct. You know most of them intuitively. Then why is it that so many bartenders consistently step on those conventions? And why do they all seem to wait on me?

One such convention suggests that inquiring if a customer would like another drink when the person’s glass is still half full (or empty) is pushy and waiting until he is spinning the glass upside down on a length of sip sticks is inattentive. The time to ask is when the person’s drink is about a quarter full (or three-quarters empty).

Another source of ruffled feathers is failing to acknowledge that customers exist. When people sit down at a bar, they will extend the bartender a certain grace period before she sidles over to take their order. Miss the grace period and she‘ll have to nearly kill them with hospitality to overcome the snub. If the bartender is temporarily too busy to wait on guests, that grace period can be easily extended with a smile and an “I’ll be right with you.”

If you’re one who likes to keep score, forgetting what a person is drinking leaves a negative impression (minus two points), while recalling a regular customer’s name and using it correctly in a sentence is a major bartending coup (plus six points). Being friendly and polite is still politically correct (plus five), but gratuitous, overly friendly behavior is as convincing as a soap opera love scene (minus 3).

A bartender’s professionalism is most apparent when the bar is busy. Whether it’s that certain “calm under fire” quality or their precise bursts of movement, really good bartenders are a pleasure to watch. On the flip side, a bartender who loses his cool, making the customers bear the brunt of his anger is like a cold hard slap of reality. People get slapped around plenty in their day-to-day life without being subjected to it during “happy hour.”

Well, I’m out of here. I’ve been ignored, over-charged, under-whelmed and desperate to decompress in someplace classier. Perhaps McDonalds is open.

What's next?

No word yet on whether the state of Washington will appeal the ruling in favor of Costco in all the issues before the court, except for  resale of spirits and wine to other retailers, which the court denied. But  an influential source has weighed in.  The money quote from the Seattle Post-Intelligencer:

Even for those who would support the notion that it's the state's obligation to promote temperance, it's tough to make the argument that the arcane state system is accomplishing that objective. In any event, lowering the cost of top-end wines is hardly going to cast the gutters awash with well-heeled tipplers.

As Pechman wrote, "These restraints must yield to the national goals of a competitive, free-market economy."

The state should forgo an appeal and adjust to the modern era.

No word from Costco what they will do next, but they operate stores in 37 states, many of them control states. Along with the many alterations in state laws regarding shipping in-state and out, the consolidation of the wholesale industry may be significant only as long as some court doesn't overturn 21st Amendment-based rules on anti-trust grounds. Next?

Slam Dunk

Okay, the hammer has come down, and come down hard, in Costco vs. Washington State. Judge Marsha Pechman has ordered the state's Liquor Control Board to stop enforcing parts of its system, and soon. Pechman's decision is considered the most serious in a series of challenges to the implementation in various states.

Here's the money quote from Pechman:

If the state desires to promote temperance by artificially increasing beer and wine prices, the state could readily achieve that goal in a manner that does not run afoul of the Sherman Act.

Here's what Washington can no longer do: Force producers and distributors to each mark up their products by 10 percent. Ban high-volume discounts to retailers on beer and wine. Ban credit sales to retailers. Ban central warehousing of beer and wine by retailers. Require that beer and wine distributors and producers post and hold prices for a month. Require wholesalers to charge uniform prices to all retailers. Require wholesalers to charge the same "delivered" price to all retailers, no matter what the actual delivery cost.

Turns out that the state's strategy of claiming that moderating consumption was part of their work didn't fly at all. Pechman attacked the claim and said neither the state legislature nor the LCB had "expressed such a purpose" before the suit.

Industry organizations are responding: From the National Beer Wholesalers Association's Craig Purser:

This is a disappointing decision for anyone in Washington State concerned with the states ability to regulate alcohol under the 21st Amendment in a fair, balanced and competitive marketplace. Judge Marsha Pechman’s decision also flies in the face of last year’s Supreme Court case regarding wine sales which stated, ‘the three-tier system itself is unquestionably legitimate.’

In addition to the possibility of limiting choice and convenience for Washington State consumers, public safety is at issue when the court breaks down regulations governing the safe control of alcoholic beverages. Judge Pechman is essentially implying that alcohol should be treated like any other product – not one that can have serious consequences if abused or consumed by those underage.

This decision also presents a big problem for the numerous independent alcohol retailers in Washington  State, as Judge Pechman has taken a level playing field and tilted it in favor of big box retailers. The decision denies Washington  State the ability to utilize seventy years of time tested regulation that assures fairness in the marketplace and provides all retailers – big and small – with the same services and value. It is our hope that the state will appeal this decision.

Here's what the Wine and Spirits Wholesalers had to say last year before the decision:

You may be aware that Costco has brought suit in Washington State using the same legal theory as that employed in the direct shipping lawsuits, alleging that Washington's allowing in-state suppliers to ship direct to retail while denying that privilege to out-of-state suppliers is unconstitutional. Should Costco prevail in that argument and they are permitted to deal directly with suppliers, their economic power will invariably drive prices down and smaller retailers out. Since Costco admits in its pleadings that it focuses on just a limited number of SKU's, the loss of local retail establishments - which offer on average 500-1000 SKU's of wine - will in the long run hurt smaller to mid-level wineries who do not make it onto the list of big box SKU's. (More here.)

What will be the primary effects? Pending a certain appeal, Costco claims prices will drop to consumers in Washington; wholesalers claim smaller retailers will be killed off, although the growth of niche retailers nationwide isn't likely to be changed by this ruling - Costco's limited SKU policy means buyers looking for lower-production or emerging wines will need to shop elsewhere.

In fact, this argument is probably dead, as is another of the wholesaler's claims regarding changes in the beverage alcohol business: that granting wineries the ability sell directly to consumers will somehow cause a significant increase in under-age consumption. Wholesalers frequently assert that part of their contribution to the beverage alcohol industry is to limit access for under-age consumers.

But I don't see how any judge can be expected to buy that one. It's retailers and restaurant operators who are the real gate-keepers - they're the ones asked to decide who can buy alcohol and the ones sued when something goes awry. Wholesalers who defend their businesses on this basis had better drop it, or else significantly increase their public commitment and spending, and enhance their public image, as a force determined to stop under-age drinking, the way suppliers have.

It's very hard to convince the average person that an association whose members derive their income from sales of a product are legitimately interested in limiting those sales. It may be unfair, given that distributors, like suppliers, create lots of programs aimed at just that end. But skepticism in this matter should be anticipated and fought in the public arena. Not to draw a comparison between the two industries, but  do YOU believe the anti-youth-smoking  ads produced on behalf of the tobacco companies would have occurred absent intense and unrelenting legal and social assault against smoking?

Lots can happen in the next 30 days, and if appealed, this case may drag on. But other states with antiquated beverage alcohol laws and a few Costcos or other Big Box store selling wine and spirits can expect follow-up suits soon. The shake-up continues.

Flavors

New vodka flavors are out, or soon to be, from two of the big guys: blueberry from Stolichnaya and ruby red grapefruit from Absolut. So I updated my list of vodka flavors already in the market:

Orange
Lemon
Lime
Blueberry
Ginger
Citron/Citrus
Peach
Rose
Almond
Watermelon
Mango
Caramel
Olive
Honey
Bilberry
Hazelnut espresso
Melon
Blood orange
Meyer lemon
Key lime
Buddha’s hand
Keffir lime leaf
Grapefruit
Green tea
Clementine
Raspberry
Strawberry
Cranberry
Currant
Banana
Peach
Apple
Cherry
Pineapple
Chocolate
Dutch Chocolate
Coconut
Pepper
Vanilla
Spice
Merlot
Chardonnay
Passionfruit
Guava
Feijoa
Kiwi
Pomegranate
Buffalo grass

Have I left any out? There are multiples, of course, of many flavors, like lemon and orange, and some are better than others, even some very good ones. But isn't this enough? Is there no end to it?

I make herbal infusions (sage and rosemary are my favorites)  for cooking and to spice up a drink, and many bartenders have been whipping up their own concoctions to do the same, but  I doubt retailers or restaurants can absorb  many more varieties from manufacturers. Still, I'm sure I'll be hearing about a new flavor again any day now...

World's Best Brews

This morning, I took a look at the many winners in the World Beer Cup 2006. There are a lot - 85 brew categories, three brewer categories and two brewpub categories. Miller and their brewmaster Dr. David Ryder grabbed the cup for large brewery and brewmaster, as did Firestone Walker, Paso Robles, CA, and Matthew Brynildson for mid-size brewery and brewmaster, and Michael Plank and his eponymous Laaber, Germany brewery for small brewing company. The award for Large Brewpub went to Russian River Brewing Company, Santa Rosa, CA and brewmaster Vinnie Cilurzo. The award for Small Brewpub went to Piece Brewing, Chicago, and brewmaster Jonathan Cutler.

Organizers claim to be the world's largest  international beer competition for commercial breweries, with more than 2,220 entries from 540 breweries in 56 countries. Breweries from Argentina, Australia, Belgium, Canada, Czech Republic, Dominican Republic, El Salvador, England, Germany, Iceland, Italy, Japan, Lithuania, Netherlands, Paraguay, Romania, Russia, Trinidad and the U.S. received awards in Seattle.

In the lengthy winner's list you'll find familiar brews - Shiner Light won for American-style light amber lager and Miller's Icehouse for American-style specialty lager - some throwbacks - Pabst Blue Ribbon for American-style premium lager and Old Style for American cream ale or lager - some international kings - Hoegaarden for Belgian-style wheat and Fuller's ESB for English-style extra special bitter, but for the most part, the winners were America's small and medium sized brewers, who faced down a growing international presence in this event and showed great. Big Beer had some wins here, but at a time when the brewing category seems to be thrashing around in mature markets worldwide, there are plenty of signs that good beer will eventually come to the rescue of bland beer 

Lambic- Nectar From The Gods

I view the world from a metaphysical perspective. I believe that we and everything in the Universe are part of a cosmic samba, interweaving in the great All, each integral to the experience of the other, part of a vast intelligence. I also believe that we haven’t yet scratched the surface of what we don’t know about the ways and mysteries of Life in this star field.

One of my all time favorite mysteries is the Magic of Spontaneous Fermentation.

(Pause for a moment and remind yourself that, but for S.F., you would not be enjoying the life you now know in the Beverage business. If that first wayward yeast spore hadn’t found its way into a bowl of wet grain owned by someone who, for some unfathomable reason, looked at the resulting bubbling goo and thought, ‘yeah, I’m gonna drink that’, you might be selling widgets right now instead of living a lifestyle way beyond what you could afford to do if you were, in fact, said widgeteer.)

In the millennia since that happy day, the spontaneous has been supplanted with the intentional in beer brewing. It isn’t good or bad...it just is.

Except in Belgium. Except with Lambics. There, we have beer in its most primal and beautiful form. Warm, toasted grain, mixed with clear, fresh local waters, blended with sultry summer fruits, all stewing happily away. When, lo, from the dust and cobwebs of an ancient brewhouse, floats down like gilded faeries the air born yeasts, alighting upon the surface of the heady potion, burrowing in to blow the magic bubbles of fermentation, turning the fruity porridge into that divine elixir, a Belgian lambic.

This brew is unique in the beer world...part beer, part wine, part champagne, it embodies the best features of all three. Strong, yet fruity, deep yet light, bubbly, yet solid... it is all forms coalesced into one perfect whole.

The most well known one out there is Belgium’s Lindemans Framboise, which is lovely and tastes like fresh red raspberries in a glass. I prefer their Cassis or the Kriek, for the tart-sweet effervescence they offer. These two have more of the quixotic tang of a Belgian Sour ale, zingy and spry, mixed with musky dark fruit, perfect in their union.

But I don’t love Lambic just for the flavor, though I do love it for that... What I love is the imagery of the ephemeral yeast, finding their purpose almost by happenstance, in that Eternal Mystery of Interconnectedness that all things have.

And the paradigm shift that made that ancient, original brewer pick up a fetid bowl of swamp sludge and drink it.

And the moment of clarity when that paleo-Belgian decided to let his beer take its own surreptitious journey to fermentation, thereby producing a unique work of brewing art that is of the land, organically evolved, expressing the very earth it sprang from.

Coincidences? I think not. I prefer to view it all as a divine idea, a nectar from the gods, and sent to us as an offering of peace and companionship from a friendly and abundant Universe, happily manifesting in the brew kettles of Belgium and in the bottles in my frig. Pop the cork on a delicious Belgian lambic and drink to Life.

Inside the SF Spirits Competition

I think being a judge at the San Francisco World Spirits Competition is the highlight of my work year. The recently concluded event is the largest spirit competition in the United States and is widely considered the most prestigious of its type.

Now in its sixth year, the two-day competition is the brainchild of authors and spirits authorities F. Paul Pacult and Anthony Dais Blue. Paul is a widely published writer and the editor of the critically acclaimed Spirits Journal. Anthony Dais Blue is a Bon Appetit contributing editor and the author of numerous books on cocktails and wines.

What I find fascinating about these two industry giants is their total lack of pretense and snobbery. If any individuals have the right to take themselves seriously it’s F. Paul Pacult and Anthony Dais Blue, and frankly, it’s a marvel to me that they don’t.

The competition is held in two elegantly appointed meeting rooms at the Mandarin Oriental Hotel. The 20 judges are divided into panels of four. In addition to Pacult and Blue, this year’s roster included spirits authorities Richard Charleton Hacker, Stephen Beal and Sean Ludford; authors and sommeliers Steve Olson and Doug Frost; noted mixologists Dale DeGroff, Tony Abou-Ganim and David Wondrich, and restaurateurs Julio Bermejo and Audrey Saunders.

This year just over 700 spirits and liqueurs from 52 countries were submitted for evaluation. Stringent measures are taken to prevent the judges from even accidentally learning the identity of a brand being evaluated. The organizers and support staff squawk noisily if a judge happens near the area where the participating products are staged and prepared for review. I regretted making that mistake.

The tasting flights usually consist of between ten and twenty products, which are positioned in front of each judge in covered glasses marked only with a letter. Each flight consists of spirits falling within the same category. Then the real work kicks in. Each spirit is nosed in succession, the impressions of which will correspond closely to how the spirit will taste on the palate. Once completed, it’s back to the beginning of the line for a slow and methodical evaluation of each spirit’s taste and the character of its finish.

After the panel’s four judges have finished with their evaluations, each entry is discussed in turn and medals are awarded. Medals range from bronze through gold, with the option to award a product no medal. The coveted Double Gold medal is awarded when the four judges agree that the product is a consensus gold medal winner. Only a tenth of the products entered in the competition earned this distinction.

At the end of the competition, the judges convene and choose between the double gold winners in each category to select the “Best of Show” captions. Once again, this year’s honorees are magnificent, the short list of which includes:

Best of Show – White Spirit — Plymouth Gin
Best of Show – Whisk(e)y — Laphroaig 30 Year Old Single Islay Malt
Best of Show – Liqueur — Green Chartreuse
Best of Show – Tequila — El Tesoro Paradiso
Best of Show – Fruit Liqueur — Grand Marnier Cuvée Speciale Cent Cinquantenaire
Best of Show – Irish Whiskey — Jameson 12 Year Old
Best of Show – Blended Scotch — Johnny Walker Green Label
Best of Show – North American Whiskey — Rittenhouse Bottled-in-Bond Rye
Best of Show – Rum — Ron Matusalem 10 Year Old Clasico
Best of Show – Vodka — Zyr

Rising Scotch

Buried in the voluminous Adams Handbook Advance are lots of little nuggets about the changing American alcohol market. One leapt out at me today: the breakthrough of a single malt Scotch whisky into the top ten of Scotches, the first time that's happened in the modern market. The Glenlivet is the brand that did it, passing two blended whiskies (Cutty Sark and Inver House) to become the ninth-ranked in U.S. sales. In the hands of Pernod Ricard, the fabled brand has thrived, and the introduction of a French oak finish and different age expressions has helped bolster the growth. Sure, single malts still account for less than 10 percent of the entire U.S. Scotch market, but it's the main area of growth in an otherwise sagging category - only Johnnie Walker Black among other leading brands showed significant growth last year. When the rest of the numbers are analyzed later this year in the Liquor Handbook, it will be interesting to see how the other single malts did.

Wrestling with Tannat

Fourteen Uruguayan wine producers came to town late last month in a return engagement of "The Great Tannat Tasting." Often touted as an emerging region, Uruguay will never have a significant impact on the world's wine scene, not with a total case production of 11 million cases that mostly (95%) doesn't leave the country. But wine sellers who  want to add reasonably priced wines made from a broader range of varietals to their list of wares are always looking for a new bandwagon to hop on. And wine writers are always happy to take a look elsewhere than the usual directions for inspiration.

Uruguay's calling card is tannat, best known as the primary grape in Madiran, southwest France's best known red wine. The grape probably spung up first in Basque country and likely derives its French name from its gripping tannin levels.

In fact, many of the wines showcased based on the thick-skinned and deeply ruby colored grape were tougher and more puckery than the American palate, softened by  juicy, fruity wines from the rest of the New World, are used to. Sometimes austere and even astringent, there's a lot of  ageing potential, but some winemakers are managing to soften things up so the wines are ready now.

Bodega Carlos Pizzorno showed a few of tannat wines that went against the grain. Their Don Prospero Tannat 2004 specifically presented black currant, ripe blackberries and crushed black cherry flavors along with the strong tannat backbone. With tannins under control - Pizzorno says its partially due to his leaving the grapes on the vine much longer than is ususal in his area - this is a great introductory tannat wine, and a bargain.

Other wineries showed solid tannat and tannat-blended wines as well - Ariano, Castillo Viejo and Santa Rosa especially. But there's still plenty of work to be done to move the U.S. market toward these earthy wines with moderate acidity and great potential for pairings with robust and spicy foods.

Robocco

I'm sure you've heard of mechanical bartenders, but here's a new version  you probably haven't seen. Apparently, it will eventually go to the winner in a competition I can't quite figure out. But it might be nice to have him in your own operation...